


I ONLY WANTED TO BE WANTED BY YOU

by SAMHATESTRUMP



Category: Original TLW (showtime) TV, The L Word: Generation Q (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Multi, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-06
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:34:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23038687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SAMHATESTRUMP/pseuds/SAMHATESTRUMP
Summary: I’m a big The Lword original fan and especially Bette and Tina (Jennifer and Laurel’s characters). So I’m probably going to be centred mostly on these two and their daughter (Angie) characters journey. I might add their friends here and there but just so you know this is a Tibette endgame.
Relationships: Bette Porter/ Angie Porter-Kennard, Tina Kennard/Angie Porter-Kennard, Tina Kennard/Bette Porter
Comments: 25
Kudos: 32





	1. Chapter 1

“Mom?” 

No response.

Angie stood by her mother’s home office door watching her quietly, her mother looked discouraged as she sat on her office chair at a loss on what to do next. Bette was devastated by her mayoral election loss, she had been so ready to take the fight to the city hall but it seemed her mission was over before it even began. The older brunette hadn’t heard or even noticed her daughter who was studiously watching her with a worried expression on her young features. 

“Mom!” Angie called out loudly making Bette jump 

“What?” Bette yelled from being caught off guard before she calmly composed herself and then stood up slowly. She then turned around to face her serious looking teen. She noticed Angie watching her with concern etched on her teen features and it made her feel guilty yet again for the millionth time. She straightened up her shoulders and breathed in deeply before she continued “Sorry honey. Come’ere, what can I do for you baby?” She asked softly as she opened her arms to her daughter who readily came into them.

“I was just checking up on you mama B. I know you were devastated by the election results and I wanted to make sure you’re okay.” Angie lifted her face from her mother’s chest and looked up into mother's eyes with pure innocence and sincerity in her mocha eyes. It always reminded Bette of a young Angie whenever she heard her two mothers argue about one thing or another when she was young. She was always the peacemaker in the family, always reminding her mothers what was more important. She always was. 

“I’m fine honey and yes I was devastated but I know Kit would be proud of what we have accomplished so far and will continue to do so in future. We have given some of these issues a face and this will never stop me as I’m now joining a renowned NGO as their director to fight this opioid crisis in our country. It might not be what I would have done as a mayor but it still is something which will bring into light, what people with addictions continue to go through as the government continues to ignore this issue.” Bette nodded to herself “we will overcome one day.” 

“I’m so proud of you mom and I know auntie Kit is too.” Angie said. She misses the coolest aunt anyone has ever had, in her aunt Kit. No one will ever come close. “I miss her so much.” She added sadly

“Me too baby, me too” Bette teared up a little just remembering Kit. Her older sibling and she had had reconnected after being absent from each other’s lives for so long during the last decade plus before and after Angie was born. She tightened her arms around her daughter a little more, breathing in the scent from her curly hair which always reminded her yet again of Kit. Her sister might as well have been Angie’s biological relative as they were so similar in so many ways.

They held onto each other for a few more minutes basking in their shared comfort for each other while they ruminated about their favorite person. Each was lost in their own memories of their favorite sister and aunt. 

“You know what she’d say if she were still here?” Angie murmured quietly still nestled in her mother’s arms.

“What?” Bette asked softly

“Get your ass out there and continue the fight baby sis. It’s not over yet.” Angie added with a tinge of seriousness in her voice and playfulness in her eyes making her mother chuckle with humour 

“True. That's exactly what she’d say.” Bette readily agreed as she pulled away a little to stare into her daughter's eyes smiling “I love you so much honey. And thank you for the pep talk and the hug. I needed that.” Bette admitted 

“Anytime B, anytime.” Angie added “I’m gonna go see ….” Angie smiled shyly as she jabbed her thumb towards the exit and Bette knew who she was referring to.

“Go! I know.” Bette cut her off smiling and before the teen started walking away “Angie?”

“Yes mom?” 

“Be careful honey, okay?” Bette said. “Wait!” She removed something from her table drawer and moved closer to Angie. “Here, this is for you.”

“I will mom.” Angie answered sincerely “What's this?” She asked in surprise as she accepted a small box wrapped in gift wrap paper. It wasn’t her birthday yet but her mama B always surprised her all the time.

  
  


“That is..”

The object inside the box came out flying from the roughly torn box and fell with a soft thud on the carpeted floor before Bette could answer.

“Car key?” Angie bent down and picked up the shiny silver and black BMW key from where it fell, turning it around in her fingers in total disbelief. “Mom? Is this what I think it is?” Angie asked her voice trembling with excitement 

Bette nodded in equal excitement. “Mama T and I thought you should have a nice safe car for your first ride. It’s all yours if you behave according to set rules.” Bette held her phone taking a video to send Tina later. Tina had argued at first telling Bette it was such an expensive first car for their daughter but Bette’s made up stubborn mind couldn’t be swayed, no matter what. And Tina had finally given in and given Bette half the funds to buy the car even though Bette had also argued against it unsuccessfully.

Angie's eyes lit up like a Christmas tree and a huge smile plastered itself automatically on her young features. She had such a wide grin on her face it made Bette cringe internally thinking of how much her own jaw would hurt if she were to smile like that. But it made her so happy to see the most important person in her life this happy, no one or nothing else mattered to her more than the happiness of her heart and soul. Angie was that.

The young girl came and jumped into her mother’s arms and in the process toppling her over on the leather couch behind her. 

“Oops sorry mom, but thank you so much!” She sat back up pulling her mom with her before she kissed her on the lips which surprised Bette even more. Angie stopped kissing and receiving kisses on the lips from both her mothers when she turned 9 claiming they were embarrassing her when they did that. “Whoop! Whoop!” She jumped up from the couch and headed for the exit as if what she had just done was the most usual thing ever.

“Inside the left garage.” Bette finally said after she recovered from her shocked self

Angie started to walk towards the door waving up her new ride key excitedly and as if remembering something she turned around abruptly, “By the way it’s now obvious to me that T is still very much into you and just FYI, she’ll be here for one more week. She told me last night when we went for dinner.” Angie shrugged, somehow she thought it was her mama T’s way of passing that tit bit of information to Bette on the downlow and not to seem so obvious. The ball was now on her mama B’s court, she can use that information the way she chooses to from here on. “I just thought you should know.” 

“What?” Bette asked confused and a little hopeful “She told you that?”

“No mom, not the being into you part, that is just my perception of how she’s been acting since she came back in town. She told me about being here for one more week knowing I will tell you about it even though she said you didn't need to know about it, “she suddenly has some business in town to attend to apparently”” Angie made quotes with her fingers of the last sentence above her head “I have a feeling Carrie doesn’t stand a chance if you play your cards correctly mom.” Angie offered 

Bette couldn’t help the suspicion which appeared on her face at the mention of her ex wife by their daughter. She knew how Angie wasn’t totally on board with Tina’s engagement announcement a few days back but still felt obligated to support her choice anyway. She also wondered why Tina hadn’t reached out to her to let her know she will still be in town. She had a date that afternoon with the new woman she met while on a hiking trail with Angie the other day, should she call her and cancel? Maybe feign sickness and call T and see what’s going on before she could totally commit to moving on with someone else?

continue?


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dear boys and girls of the internet world, I’m posting this second chapter but I really have no fucking idea if you like this or not. No one has said anything and that leaves me to wonder if I’m wasting my time here. If this will continue I will need you all to start being proactive in this endeavour and interact with yours truly. Leave a comment, one word sentence are allowed too. But ffs let me know if you’d like me to continue or not. I wondered why there are less Bette and Tina fics but I’m starting to get the gist. No one comments on these fics which leaves the authors to wonder if they are actually wasting their time on here. That said I’ll post another chapter if I get more than five comments because I know they’re more than that number of people who have read the first one already. Or let’s end it all here and make up your own individual endings to it. What da ya say?

“Hello? Tina?”

“Oh hey Bette, how was your day?”

Bette gets comfortable on her couch as she scrolls through her work phone while her other hand held her personal phone against her ear.

“It was okay. Trying to get back into the new work mode after the campaign and finally election craziness.” 

“Good. How is the new appointment going?”

“It’s really good.” Bette smiles brightly thinking of how well her meeting went “I was in a meeting earlier with the board of directors and they are all really committed to taking this drugs epidemic fight to the re-elected mayor’s office. If he thinks he’s going to partner with the same people flooding our communities with these dangerous drugs and get away with it, he’s got another thing coming.” Bette finished with the confidence Tina always knew she possessed no matter the circumstances.

“That’s good, I’m really happy for you Bette.” Tina said, smiling. 

She was devastated for Bette when she lost the mayoral election but hearing her now made her feel hopeful for her again. The loss of election hadn’t left her ex defeated, not her Bette. She was the strongest person Tina had ever met and she never once backed down from a challenge. Bette’s resilience inspired her in her own work and life to date. She had seen her ex at her lowest of low points but she never stayed down for long. She always came back swinging twice if not stronger than ever before. 

“I know it wasn’t what you wanted but it’s a start for now hon…umm Bette.” Tina caught her slip but not quickly enough 

“Thanks T.” Bette smiles to herself when she catches on Tina almost calling her honey “So, our kid tells me you’re still in LA? I thought your flight was right after your lunch with her the other day?” 

“Oh ummm… “ Tina was caught off guard. That little shit! Think fast Tina think fast! She kicked herself inwardly for pausing too long. She transferred the phone to her other ear trying to compose herself “I mean you know how it is with being a movie exec. Things change fast, they want me to scout for a new location for our next big budget movie here in LA.” 

She knew even Bette knew that location scouting was way below her pay grade, they had experts who specifically dealt with all that. 

But Tina wasn’t completely lying, she was just not telling the whole truth. Location scouting people were already in LA doing their job and she had offered to do it with them so that she sticks around LA longer. Her decision to stay ended up bringing a huge fight between her and Carrie to a point of her fiancé accusing her of cheating with her ex wife. And for some unexplainable reasons Tina didn’t deny it either, which left her fiancé fuming even more. She knew it was a matter of hours before Carrie flew to LA to get answers straight from her. 

After Tina was informed by Angie that her mom had a dinner date with this press chick called Maya, she couldn’t stop thinking about Bette and how she could easily move on and fall in love with someone else. She will probably lose her forever if that happened and she wasn’t prepared for Bette to completely move on from her yet. She knew deep down how much they both still loved each other and the fact that Bette could easily fall in love with the beautiful reporter wasn’t sitting well with her. She needed to do something about her feelings for her ex wife. And preferably sooner than later before she loses it all.

Why was she always confused about her feelings for Bette whenever she was around her? When Tina was away from Bette things seemed to go smoothly in her life but the moment she entered Bette’s hemisphere everything seemed to suddenly change and she was left as confused as ever. They were both the love of each other’s life alright, but stars were never aligned for them to live happily ever after especially going by their long history of make ups and break ups. 

Bette felt a wave of disappointment envelop her at Tina’s announcement. She had hoped Tina had changed her mind about them but apparently it was indeed just business keeping her around “I see.” Bette finally responded quietly with a tinge of sadness lacing her voice “So, is Carrie flying over to see you?” Might as well rip away that bandaid, Bette thought.

“Umm.. “ Tina rubbed her forehead with her slender fingers as she held her phone against her ear tighter with her other hand “I don’t know!” Tina chuckled mirthlessly “I mean she’s busy too with her work, you know?” 

“Yeah I guess.” Bette nodded her head as she said quietly. She wasn’t about to get her hopes up and only have them crush and burn again. As much as Tina sounded unsure of what she just told her, Bette was going to sit this one out, she wasn’t sure what Tina wanted. “How long do you suppose you’ll be around? I mean scouting for the movie location?” 

“A few weeks maybe even a month, I don’t know really.” Tina lay back on her two seater couch and stared up at the ceiling in her hotel room trying to study it as if it would suddenly morph into the answer she needed desperately. “But on the bright side this gives me a chance to spend more time with Angie, so it's actually a win in my book.” 

Bette didn’t know there was another side to this but she went along “That sounds great T, I mean Angie will really love that.” She said quietly as she also laid down on her living room couch and stared up at her high ceiling “I’m really happy for our daughter, she’s really missed spending each waking moment with you T.” ‘I do too,’ She added inwardly ‘I miss you so desperately.’

“Me too Bette, me too.” Tina’s soft voice cut into her daydreaming as if answering her inner dialogue “Bette?” She softly whispered the name breathily, the name which was always at the tip of her tongue. 

You could cut the tension in the air with a knife at that moment when Tina husked out Bette’s name the way she used to when they were still lovers. 

“Yeah?” Bette breathed out hopefully. She started to fumble with her shirt’s buttons restlessly as she felt her body awakening after a year-long absence of Tina’s touch. 

“I’m happy to be here too.” Tina whispered back before she started again “I miss you so much sometimes Bette. I miss us, how we used to parent Angie even when things were the most acrimonious between us. We still held and do to this day hold this deep respect for each other and the same core values even after all these years.”

“Yeah you’re right Tina. And I miss you too, it has never stopped hurting....” Bette admitted quietly taking a deep breath before she continued “But!” Her voice rose to higher pitch indicating she was trying hard not to cry. She massaged her furrowed eyebrows and tried hard to blink back the pool in her eyes, she wasn’t going to cry today, no. She had done tons of crying over her life failures for too long. Tina was part of those failures she had mourned. She somehow couldn’t ever get it right with Tina, no matter how hard she tried. “I know you’re not in love with me anymore and that’s okay…” Bette paused holding in a hiccup “I’m really happy that you’re happy T. That’s all I ever wanted for you, to be loved and happy.”

Tina aggressively wiped at her own tears which hadn’t stopped rolling down the sides of her face when she admitted missing Bette. “I .. I’m.” She stammered 

“Shh… I know baby. You don’t have to explain anything to me. She makes you happy and I’m happy for you both.” Even when she was saying that she didn’t believe a word which was coming from her mouth. She was happy Tina was happy but she was falling to pieces for herself sake.

“Bette?” Tina whispered again 

“It’s okay Tina, I mean it.”

“Bette!” Tina’s clipped tone stopped Bette on her tracks. 

Bette’s all knowing attitude was always a contentious issue between them. It seemed it hadn’t changed one bit even when they lived apart. 

Bette suddenly went totally silent hearing the frustration in Tina's voice. When there was a long pause from the other end of the phone she almost opened her mouth but..

“Don’t!” Tina warned as if she had anticipated Bette almost interrupting her train of thought at that very moment 

Bette opened her mouth and closed it several times like a fish out of water but no words came out. She turned her phone around and glared at it but she also wanted to make sure Tina was still on the line. 

“We need to talk.” Tina finally said “Face to face, I mean.”

“Okay.” Bette readily agreed and felt as if she was finally allowed to say something then “How about Dana’s tomorrow at 6?” 

“I’d prefer somewhere more private,” Tina said knowing they might run into their friends at Shane’s bar. “My hotel room, I’ll order room service.” 

“Okay.” Bette said cautiously

Bette wasn’t sure if it was a good idea being with Tina in such an extremely private setting like a hotel room. She would have asked her to come to her house but then Angie was having a ‘study date’ with Jordi so that was out of the question. And in any case going by the insistence on the privacy request she figured she would have turned that offer down too.

After they ended their conversation.

“Oh shit! Maya!” Bette cursed herself for forgetting about her date with Maya the same time she had planned to meet Tina. “Fuck me!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave a comment before you log off if you want a continuation next. Read my beginning notes above this chapter. Cheers ✌️


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This was not proof read, it might have a lot of inconsistencies. Point them out to me please? And I’ll try to rectify them as much as I can. And please keep those comments coming. I love reading from y’all. And another thing, please stay safe out there, such an unpredictable world we’re living through right now.

After they had consumed their room service dinner consisting of lobster tails, mashed potatoes and mixed veggies, Tina and Bette took their half filled wine glasses and settled on a three seater couch next to the little two seater dining table. 

Chuckling “I’m so fucking full, it’s sinful.” Bette announced as she caressed her flat tummy making Tina giggle 

“Me too. I thought chef Paolo was kidding when he claimed to be the best lobster cook in town. But I admit I unequivocally agree with him after this scrumptious spread.” Tina said as she mirrored Bette’s tummy rubs on herself. 

They were quiet for a moment as each was lost in the afterglow of one of the most delicious meals they’d shared. It felt like the old times when they’d just sit around and enjoy each other’s presence in silence. A silence most other people would find daunting or even oppressive but not them. It's like their thoughts at a time like this synced with each other. Bette moved closer to Tina and gently laid her head on her shoulder as she let out a satisfied sigh. 

“Do you remember this?” Bette broke the silence quietly 

Tina nodded “Yes. Yes, I do.” She answered softly as she turned her neck and kissed the top of Bette’s head before laying her head there. 

They were quiet again inwardly reminiscing about their old lives when they first met and before they had their daughter _.  
_

 _  
Life was so carefree then, they had little to no life changing responsibilities then. The only responsibility they had was to each other and their friends_. 

_But then they decided to start a family and when they had a miscarriage in their first attempt, things started getting strenuous between them. They stopped communicating and listening to each other’s needs, desires and fears. Unfortunately for them, they let things spiral so out of control that verbal fights dominated their waking moments, infidelity was born, breakups happened, soul crushing hurts branded their innermost souls as lack of trust took control of their lives._

_In spite of all that, the star crossed lovers got back together again and tried hard to cement those open cracks created during those difficult periods in their lives. With their daughter now in the mix they tried everything possible to keep patching those cracks which kept on opening up every so often until they couldn’t anymore. That was when Angelica was just a baby_. 

_Bette and Tina went their own separate ways after that but not before another round of hurtful exchange between them when things failed to work out as they had hoped. This time though, it was different. Angelica was in the mix and no matter their own shortcomings with each other, their daughter was most important to them above everything and anyone else. At the end of the day they had this common denominator who was Angelica and who no matter the size of their egos they’ll always come together amicably and raise her to be the best version of themselves._

_As time went on they were both involved with other people but still that thing, that rare thing between them couldn’t let them go on in peace. After a while they got back together again to the dismay of their individual partners at the time. Even though their friends and family knew their getting back together was inevitable and that it just a matter of time before the two gravitated towards each other again, it came as a surprise to them on how it all went down_. 

_Of course Bette, branded as ‘the gianormous cheater’ by Alice’s (their dear annoying friend) professional deduction lived up to her reputation yet again. And to make matters worse, the aforementioned cheater’s once upon a time victim of such a hurtful event herself, Tina, became a willing partner in Bette’s sinful ways._

_The self sabotaging factor in Bette’s character wasn’t lost on either of them as she once again committed her to go sin, which was infidelity, again._

_Unfortunately for Bette, on the receiving end was none other than the formidable award winning artist in her own rights, her then partner and the once upon a time self proclaimed non-monogamous Jodie Lerner. Bette unknowingly became Ms Lerner’s public enemy number one. Jodie went on to perfect the art of revenge by a scorned lover which garnered a lot of praise from all those who had been cheated on by their lovers. It’s like Jodie had suddenly awoken these sleeping giants in everyone who was jilted or was going to be jilted in future. Jodie’s mission was to dish as much hurt and humiliation as she had suffered after succumbing to Bette’s charms, in a way she had never allowed herself to be with anyone before._

_After that humiliating episode, the family set off to New York leaving their friends and family behind in Los Angeles. They wanted to push a reset button for their lives in a new city away from too many familiar prying eyes and ears. Maybe this time it will work, the two lovers soon to be wives hoped._

_Both women seemingly on equal grounds both in their careers and emotional standings almost succeeded in all aspects of their lives, almost. Staying away from their family and friends proved to be daunting so they moved back to LA a couple of years later. Life went on and the two made it work for more than a decade after Angelica, raising their daughter to the best of their abilities_. 

_But Tina still somehow felt less than equal to Bette, even after all these years. So, even though things seemed like they were running smoothly from the outside, Tina was still battling her own demons on the inside. She was later to learn from her therapist that her feelings of inequality to Bette had nothing to do with her partner, instead they had everything to do with her own self esteem. The therapist advised Tina to work on herself first if she was ever going to stand fully and on equal grounding with Bette._

_She had always attributed her feelings of inadequacy to Bette’s dominant personality where every single part of their lives was concerned. But that was not it. With Bette, love her or hate her, she was who she was. It was never something she taught herself to become; it was embedded in her DNA, it ran through her bloodstream and Tina knew this from the time she met her. What Tina_ ne _eded to do was to fully accept that side of Bette and never see it as something she should compete with or measure up to. She knew deep down she had tons of other strengths where Bette was the weaker link, all she needed to do was to find herself and balance out her partner’s strengths._

_So, she left for a far, far away land._

_At first she convinced herself that the leaving part was to be a temporary separation in order to fix herself. But things once again got out of control. Tina became so wrapped in finding herself that she forgot why she was doing it in the first place. She moved away to a foreign country and a large city not necessarily New York large but almost as busy. While in Toronto, she was appointed by Warner brothers to head one of their largest movie businesses in the North American country which kept her busy almost 24/7. While there she made a headway on finding herself by interacting with a lot of people from different social backgrounds and continued to learn even more about herself_. 

_And then came along Carrie. In a lot of ways, Carrie reminded Tina of Bette._

_At this point things with Bette had gotten from bad to worse since she made her move. The two ultimately agreed on a quiet divorce in order to avoid disrupting their young daughter’s life. They agreed for Angelica to continue living with Bette in Los Angeles during the school year and spent two thirds of her summers and holidays with Tina in Toronto._

_What hurt Bette the most was Tina’s indecisiveness about their relationship. Tina wanted to stay married to Bette while she also wanted to lead a different life in a different country and city far away from her family. It made no sense to both Bette and their friends. To Bette it was like Tina wanted to have her cake and eat it too, it wasn’t going to work for her, she needed someone close by._

_After all these years her love for Tina was as steady as ever even when they fought which was normal for any normal couple. She still loved her deeply and she didn’t understand why Tina left nor continued to stay away even when she lost her sister Kit who was their daughter's beloved aunt due to a drug overdose. Of all the things that had happened between them over the years, that was cruelest of them all. They had had worse disagreements in their lives before but they have always been there for each other during hard times. So when Tina stayed away when Kit died, Bette knew from that moment on that it was never going to be the same again between them. She didn’t know how they could come back from that._

Bette quickly wiped away a tear which had escaped from the pool in her eye “I’m sorry.” She released a muffled sob 

Tina was confused as to why Bette was crying and apologizing “What are you sorry for Bette?” She asked dumbly as she placed her left hand around the other woman’s shoulders and held her tight against her.

“I’m so sorry for every terrible thing I did to you when we were together, that you hated me so much you couldn’t be there when Kit died.” More tears rolled down her cheek as she tried hard to wipe them off quickly. She wasn’t planning on falling apart in Tina’s arms tonight but here she was, only she could bring Bette to her knees time and again like this. 

A sharp pain ripped through Tina’s gut on hearing the buried hurt in Bette’s voice. “Oh my God! No!” The exclamation was a response to the shock in hearing what Bette was holding onto due to her desertion during a difficult period in her family’s life. She loved Kit as much as her family did but something kept her away from coming back to them. She now wondered what it was, then she’d totally convinced herself it was for the best and that she didn’t want to confuse things between them especially after their divorce. Most importantly she didn’t want to confuse Angie? But she was second guessing that hurtful decision now. 


End file.
